The highly successful Hire A Hubby franchise has begun legal proceedings against the Australian Federal Government, claiming the refusal to legalise same sex marriage is damaging the company’s profits.
Representatives of the tradesman and repair service argue the current law prevents men from hiring a handyman through their company and that this has severely restricted their business model.
“Men are prevented from entering into voluntary, legally binding contracts with one another in Australia and this prevents them from soliciting the services of Hire A Hubby, which prides itself on providing a holistic service to all of it’s customers,” stated a spokesperson for the company.
“Furthermore, our company operates on a franchise system. As a result, we invite men to ‘Become A Hubby’, but as it stands, certain potential partners are denied the opportunity to do this.”
The company is claiming compensation for restraint of trade, arguing that the current laws allow it to service only one half of the Australian population.
Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott blasted the company for it’s actions.
“This is a scurrilous and ridiculous waste of the court’s time,” he said during an interview on Sydney radio.
“Any legally binding contract in this country must be entered into only by a man and a woman. If the company’s profits are suffering, they should just change the company name; call it ‘Hire a Handyman’, or better still, something less suggestive, such as ‘Rent A Boy’.
Senator Cory Bernardi supported Abbott’s comments and took them even further.
“If we allow men to hire a husband, where does it end?,” he scoffed.
“Soon, animals and robots will want to hire husbands, or worse still, we’ll see the emergence of female tradies. Men don’t even need to hire tradesmen, only women do.”
Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, meanwhile, declined to commit to the debate. Instead, he had Lucy call Hire A Hubby to install yet another fence at his Potts Point mansion.